You Will Never Regret Loving This Much

Wedding season will be in full bloom within the next few weeks. But there is never a season when those already married or those contemplating marriage would not benefit from tending the soil of their souls by renewing their understanding of what marriage is and what marriage demands.  As I say at the beginning of every wedding I officiate:

“Marriage is an institution ordained by God, regulated by His commandments, and has been blessed by our Lord Jesus Christ.  Therefore marriage should be held in high honor by all.”

In this video of a Western Pennsylvania couple, Ian & Larissa Murphy, we see a unique but much needed perspective the essence of what God wants marriage to be; what he designed it to be.

…And if while watching this video you are not tempted to tear up… Check your pulse. You are either dead, or like the Tin Man in the Wizard of Oz you have no heart.

For those interested in learning more, here is a link to Larissa’s story: Part 1 – Why We Got Married; Part 2 – Learning Contentment in Suffering.  I love the way she opens part 1:

“You will never regret loving this much.”

10 Warning Signs of an Inwardly Obsessed Church

Researcher Thom Rainer warns of signs of a church that is so inwardly focused that it has ceased to be the church of Jesus Christ and has become, at best, a museum to (assumed) past glories, in which the membership makes up the board of directors.   Rainer writes:

Any healthy church must have some level of inward focus. Those in the church should be discipled. Hurting members need genuine concern and ministry. Healthy fellowship among the members is a good sign for a congregation.

But churches can lose their outward focus and become preoccupied with the perceived needs and desires of the members. The dollars spent and the time expended can quickly become focused on the demands of those inside the congregation. When that takes place the church has become inwardly obsessed. It is no longer a Great Commission congregation.

In my research of churches and consultation with churches, I have kept a checklist of potential signs that a church might be moving toward inward obsession. No church is perfect; indeed most churches will demonstrate one or two of these signs for a season. But the real danger takes place when a church begins to manifest three or more of these warning signs for an extended period of months and even years.

1. Worship wars. One or more factions in the church want the music just the way they like it. Any deviation is met with anger and demands for change. The order of service must remain constant. Certain instrumentation is required while others are prohibited.

2. Prolonged minutia meetings. The church spends an inordinate amount of time in different meetings. Most of the meetings deal with the most inconsequential items, while the Great Commission and Great Commandment are rarely the topics of discussion.

3. Facility focus. The church facilities develop iconic status. One of the highest priorities in the church is the protection and preservation of rooms, furniture, and other visible parts of the church’s buildings and grounds.

4. Program driven. Every church has programs even if they don’t admit it. When we start doing a ministry a certain way, it takes on programmatic status. The problem is not with programs. The problem develops when the program becomes an end instead of a means to greater ministry.

5. Inwardly focused budget. A disproportionate share of the budget is used to meet the needs and comforts of the members instead of reaching beyond the walls of the church.

6. Inordinate demands for pastoral care. All church members deserve care and concern, especially in times of need and crisis. Problems develop, however, when church members have unreasonable expectations for even minor matters. Some members expect the pastoral staff to visit them regularly merely because they have membership status.

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